Where is the satire?

Another dive on the E. Colfax route offers shots 'til close and a stern hand at closing time. The barmaids will pour shots until 1:59 a.m., and the owner will force you out one minute later.

That is the law in Colorado, no alcohol after 2 a.m.. Violations of the law bring closure to bars, so they want to make sure that every last drop is down the hatch before anyone turns into a pumpkin.

The satire lounge on Colfax near Pete's Kitchen serves Mexican food until 10 p.m. in a fitting environment. The stucco walls in the dining area remind patrons of typical Central American architecture.

After the other bars have forced out all of their patrons, there is still time to drive to the satire for one last slurp.

Sleep in

Besides the corporate breakfast places that litter the highways and suburbs, the first meal of the day can be evasive.

So many breakfast places serve only until 2 p.m., others serve a limited menu until 5 p.m..

The Snooze a.m. Eatery is new on the corner of 23rd and Larimer Sts. in Denver. Sam's No. 3 serves breakfast all day, but you have to get in line early for Lucile's on 275 S. Logan, otherwise you just don't eat.

Charlie Brown's serves late breakfast on the weekends, they are located on 10th and Grant. Watercourse Foods on 13th and Sherman Sts. also serves late weekend breakfast.

There are places to go after a late morning in Denver, but they require some seeking out. If waiting for a table isn't your style, try Charlie Brown's. If the crack of dawn is your cup of coffee then head for Lucile's, for some flavor.

The P.S. Lounge

This low-profile lounge on the east end of Greek town defies the expectation of an east Colfax watering hole.

Patsy Cline and Frank Sinatra are common choices on the juke box, and every girl gets a rose from the owner, Pete who is himself, quite the lady's man.

A life-size picture of Marilyn Monroe and a similar one of Elvis begin a long wall of fame that share pictures of celebrities and patrons alike.

Guest bartenders can keep their tips on Sundays and Wednesdays after working behind the cash-only bar.

House shots go 'round the room and Pete is generous when it comes to buying a round, he never lets his patrons go thirsty.

Enzo's End pizza is next door and the barkeep will call and order a pie while keeping the drinks fresh. The pizza is incredible and doesn't require a cash payment; the guys from Enzo's will charge it to the plastic so there's more cash for the booze.

If you're a local there's no excuse for missing the P.S. Lounge. Regulars and travelers alike share stories of the P.S. far and wide.

Ride the What?

RTD has attracted a lot of media coverage lately, between the strikes and the rising rates. Still, the trains only run half of the time north of 18th Street in Denver.

It is interesting to note where the light rail serves. There are more people per capita up north in Thornton than there are in Highlands Ranch, but the train does not go past 30th and Downing Streets in Five-Points.

The final station on Downing St. Is irregularly patrolled, but crime rates along the Welton line have been high for years. From homicides to auto theft and assault, Five Points and the Downing St. Station are frequently mentioned on the nightly news.

It is hard to blame the Union workers for not liking the 30th and Downing station, the trains are frequently abused, left messy with tags and litter.

Why then did RTD decide to install nice padded seats in the trains? Places like New York and London have metal or plastic seating for a reason: it's cheaper and easier to maintain, not to mention it is cleaner.

Someday the light rail will reach Thornton, Arvada and even Fort Collins, but by that time, the running cars may not have the luxurious seats they do now.

The Walnut Room

The Walnut Room on 31st and Walnut Streets in Denver is just far enough from downtown to find parking, and close enough to catch happy hour and pizza after work.

The building is new and houses more than just a bar, the Walnut Room has live music most nights in a well-insulated back room.

The back room was built with up-to-date sound equipment, and enough sound insulation to separate the music room from the main bar. The Music room is dark and classy with a bar of its own and tables and a couch for lounging.

There are practice rooms available for rent in the back, but get on the waiting list, they filled up fast after the place opened. Each room is insulated from the next and has thick insulated doors as well.

Paulie and Howard serve up the drinks in the main bar where the bass from the music room can be felt. Two television sets entertain the bar, and the pizza is incredible; there is an option to build your own pie.

With its diverse environment and a few entertaining regulars the Walnut Room is a great watering hole and a good place to meet people.

City Council meeting

The Denver City Council gave final approval Monday for an ordinance that promotes an agreement between the City and County of Denver and the State of Colorado concerning the "HAVA Compliant Voting System" program. HAVA is the Help America Vote Act of 2002. The proposed bill allocates $1.4 million for the update, addition, and maintenance of 240 new electronic voting machines.

The controversy over electronic voting is that while it ensures the rights of some, it inhibits the voice of others. Electronic voting has invoked accuracy concerns regarding vote counting, the most notable of which occurred in 2004 when votes in many states were miscounted. The main concerns involving electronic voting revolve around lost votes. To the general public, this means that their voices are not being heard.

"Nothing in our democracy is as important as voting, and having that vote count," said city council member Kathleen MacKenzie who supports the bill.

There are problems with the bill that range from finances to inaccuracy and unsecured counting techniques. The electronic voting machines that the city already has are not yet paid off. Former city council member Jeff Cahoon said that cautioned against the purchase of these machines saying that we would be replacing the paper ballot system with one that is “susceptible to flaw and abuse.”

“There is no computer system that cannot be overcome,” said speaker Timothy Eme, an independent software consultant for the Federal Government. MacKenzie then pointed out that it would be just as easy to interfere with a paper ballot count.

The advantage to the electronic voting system is that it allows the disabled to vote privately. Speaker Faith Gross represents people with disabilities; she says that “they have the right to vote independently and privately.” The electronic voting system allows blind people and those with dexterity disabilities to vote without outside assistance.

“There are four main concerns about the voting system, it must be secure, accurate, recountable, and accessible,” said Bonnie Clark who warned the council about the reliability standards of the machines. The electronic voting machines have a much higher margin of error than paper ballots.

Software creator Jeff Cook showed his skepticism about the system by telling the council that “Germany uses paper ballots.” He said that the money should be spent on enabling the disabled to vote and no more.

The city does not need to buy all 240 electronic voting machines; Denver will not receive or have to pay back the money it does not use. It is possible for Denver to allocate funds only for helping the disabled. Mail ballots are gaining popularity and, as Council President Rosemary E. Rodriguez believes, mail ballots will be preferred in the future.

“The most important thing is that we have accurate, verifiable elections,” said Cook, “in case of a recount, we need paper ballots.”

Springtime in the Rockies

It is that time of year in Colorado, summer is close but there is still the possibility of a freeze before the warm temperatures take over. It is time to clean out the rain gutters and fire up the lawn mower. The warm days invite gardening, but don't plant prematurely, or you may be re planting again at the end of the month.

Freezing temperatures have visited Colorado as late as late May, killing trees and growing gardens. The unique climate allows for skiing as late as late April, and bike rides year round, it also makes for some difficult gardening.

Perennials are wonderful, they keep coming back as long as the season will allow, but annuals and more delicate plants can be started inside in April to get a head start and have the first blooms on the block. Flowers like Poppies and Cosmos can be started indoors as early as mid-March.

Water restrictions have been lifted this year, replaced by guidelines. Generally, watering should be done in the cool of the morning or evening, not more than three times per week on calm dry days. Watering under the hot sun can make a lot of the water evaporate from the ground.

Besides freezing temperatures late into the season, hail can also damage new vegetation, so when the stones start to fall, you may want to provide cover for those delicate leafy plants in the yard.

The precipitation we see now has to last through the dry months of the summer, so, enjoy it while it lasts!

Colorado goes smoke free

Fort Collins and Boulder were first to go, now all Coloradans face limitations regarding where they light up. Arguments for and against the ban have been stated and restated as the vote took place, but now, June 1, all bets are off, and all cigarettes are out.

When the city of Fort Collins went smoke free they encountered an immediate threat besides the citizens who whined that they had to go outside; the city found itself cleaning up more trash than usual.

The night of the ban, the city streets were lined with cigarette butts and matches. Eventually the bars began to put out buckets for ashtrays, but the problem went on for weeks. Both patron and business owner complained, and the buckets filled up, but so did the streets and sidewalks.

Littering is not legal, but it is possible that smokers, forced to perpetuate their habit outside may litter due to the lack of proper disposal options, but also as a form of retaliation to the law.

"Overall, I think it is a good thing," Said Pete, owner of the P.S. Lounge on E. Colfax Ave. When asked if the change would affect his business, he said "we'll deal with it, but it is a good change."

The general feeling agrees with Pete, they believe it is a good thing, even one patron said she may quit smoking entirely once the ban takes effect, but what can the city do about the problem of litter in the streets?

June 2, after the first night of the ban, will there be cigarette butts on the ground resembling the after-effects of a hail storm? If ashtrays are provided in plenty will smokers litter anyway?

Breathing healthy air is a bonus, but the environment need not suffer because we kick smokers outside. Obviously not all smokers will litter. Not all bar owners will put ashtrays on the streets either. Should they be required to place a bucket outside the door?

Relaxation Fascination

Massage therapy is all over, so choosing the right therapist determines what kind of treatment you get, and the results. Many people use massage for relaxation, some use it in sports training, some people use licensed practitioners, some don’t. Looking for a massage therapist on the Internet is a good way to find both.

In order to operate a business, a massage therapist must be certified by the state as a Registered Massage Therapist, or RMT. Often an internet search for therapy will result in finding more adult sites than expected. Using caution and calling the company first is a good way to screen out bad businesses before going in for a massage.

With the gaining popularity of massage therapy, educational institutions appear everywhere. When seeking education in massage therapy, screen the educators just like the practitioners, keeping in mind that not all schools are accredited. Each state requires its own certification.

“Your criteria for school should be where it is located, what are its hours, the costs, how long is the program, what courses are offered and what percentage of graduates pass the State Board test on the first try.” Said Trish Daniel, a massage therapist who treats people with arthritis and Parkinson’s disease. Daniel says it takes time to build clientele in the field, but “the possibilities are endless on where you can work.”

Massage therapy can aid relaxation and soreness, and in some cases relieve chronic pain. Jayne Nelson, a trained energetic healer and yoga instructor said in an email interview that “Most [people] use massage therapy to relieve tension and relax.”
“I don’t believe that massage therapy does anything more than help people relax.” Nelson said strictly of massage. She has studied breathing techniques and physical strengthening treatment, even though she is not a certified massage therapist; Nelson believes that there are other ways to relieve pain.

Nelson and Daniel both agree that homeotherapy is used successfully in aiding massage. Just like anything else, making sure that the person administering the therapy is a certified professional. Nelson says she has had mixed results from naturopathic doctors, the one with remarkable results was the one with a certification.

The term Massage therapy is broad; it covers such practices as Cranial Sacral which counts the rhythm of cranial membranes to assess bodily health, and Cellulite massage that reduces unsightly cellulite. Each kind of therapy requires training and should be performed by a professional.

Sometimes a massage practice will offer different kinds of therapies like aromatherapy or homeopathic medicine. These alternative therapies are gaining popularity in the U.S., some of them sound like witchcraft, but some promise to promote health. People must do what is right for them and their healthcare plan, including research of the person administering the service.